something secret

Today, I finally saw the Paula Patton led movie, Baggage Claim , and it was.... a predictably mediocre romantic comedy. Girl meets guy, girl wants ring, guy cheats, girl shame spirals and tries to get any one of several ex-boyfriend to propose, girl's plan fails, girl realizes the right guy was (literally) next door the whole time. And, fin.  So, terrible. I did like the man-candy though. But what stuck out to me in this film was Jill Scott's character Gail, best friend to Patton's Montgomery. Gail, a fellow flight attendant, is like Scott, plus-sized and busty. But she's also blatantly sexual. From the first few scenes of the movie, we establish that Gail is "that girl"; the one who has no shame and chases after her men the way she chases her drinks. Normally, the idea of yet another hypersexualized black female character would irritate me, but this was different. We have very specific narratives for how we interact with black women in the media. We get the ...

There's been a lot written online about Beyoncé in the last week and a half. Between the initial frenzy of the release of her new album, the delight over her overtly feminist messages and the almost instantaneous backlash that Beyoncé the woman (and the body of work) was both anti-feminist, or simply not feminist enough, we've all had Beyoncé on the brain. While I did write a essay about her song Partition and had plans to write another piece examining the album as a whole, I've realized that many other writers have already done a much better job than I ever could have. There is already an amazing canon of work that critically analyzes this new album. Here are a few of my favourite pieces in approximate publication order: That Time Beyoncé's Album Invalidated Every Criticism of Feminism Ever  by Christina Coleman Beyoncé's New Self-Titled LP Is The Feminist's Album Of 2013 by Hayden Manders Beyoncé's New Self-Titled Album Is A Manifesto of Black Womanhood ...

There is a longer  more fleshed out essay on  BEYONCÉ in the works, (which probably won't be published until next week at this rate) but in rewatching King Bey's magnum opus, I have been uncovering gem after gem of naked feminist ideology, and I can't get enough. The latest little gem I found is this subversive little quote cleverly inserted in French into Partition , a song about Bey getting it on with Jay Z in the back of a limo on the way to the club: "Est-ce que tu aimes le sexe? Le sexe, je veux dire l'activité physique, le coït, tu aimes ça? Tu ne t'intéresses pas au sexe? Les hommes pensent que les féministes déstestent le sexe mais c'est une activité très stimulante et naturelle que les femmes adorent." According to friends who are much smarter than me, the above translates to: "Don't you like sex? Sex. I mean sex, the physical activity. Fucking. You like that? You're not interested in sex? Men think feminists don't like sex, b...

Back again. This time  to share  this comment thread  (and specifically the comment below) where I talk about Rashida Jones' comments about "women being whores" and how it relates to Rihanna (because Rihanna is the devil incarnate/Illuminati Queen/Bringer of all that is Evil in the world. Naturally), and the way in which the conversations about "pop stars being whores" always manages to find a BW scapegoat: I also think that it's  imperative  that we talk about racial disparities when we talk about this stuff because sexual expectations  are  just different  for WoC. For WW, virginal is the assumed natural state, and expressions of sexuality are seen as liberating (Madonna). For WoC, crass and oversexed is the assumed natural state, and self motivated expressions of sexuality are seen as a reinforcement of that stereotype. (Rihanna) If we push against it we're prudes, and  how dare we refuse a sexual advance with our ugly black ass selves?...

I wasn't online for most of today, so when I got home an hour ago and saw the furor online about #feministselfies , I had a bit of catching up to do. Trust me when I tell you that I was not in any way surprised to discover that Jezebel had stepped in it  again with a pretty condescending piece about the inherent narcissism of selfies. Plus ça change! After reading the piece though, two quotes in particular stood out to me: "Stop this. Selfies aren't empowering; they're a high tech reflection of the fucked up way society teaches women that their most important quality is their physical attractiveness." "Further, self-taken digital portraits are typically posted on social media, ostensibly with the intent of getting people to respon to them that's what social media is. In that respect, selfies aren't expressions of pride, but rather calls for affirmation." Here's the thing; my own relationship with selfies is fairly complicated. I'm a photo...

I've been thinking about writing this post for a while. It was originally conceived as an examination of the "Stripper Anthem" as presented by Nicki Minaj and Rihanna in Beez In The Trap and Pour It Up, as it related to the sexuality and sexualization of black women, but after last week's post on Lily Allen, and some of the... ill-informed responses it received, I realized that there is a different conversation that needs to be had first. That conversation is about the distinction between the exploitation of black women's sexuality for the (white) male consumerist gaze, and a black female celebrity's reclamation of her own sexuality on her own terms. For whatever reason, there seems to some difficulty in grasping the concept that the most significant difference between these two scenarios is agency , and the way in which the presence or lack of agency determines how a display of sexuality is to be perceived and received. To that end, I want to examine the ima...

I'm.... conflicted about this video.  Lily Allen has always been a bit of a socially progressive, feminist badass, and I do love her for that. In her new single "Hard Out Here", Allen discusses the state of the pop industry, and the impossible standards that women are held to in order to be allowed to progress. The lyrics are classic Lily Allen; she calls out sexism pretty blatantly, and points to the ways in which women are expected to conform in order to succeed: If I told you about my sex life, you'd call me a slut/When boys be talking about their bitches no one's making a fuss/There's a glass ceiling to break/There's money to make/ And now it's time to speed it up because I can't move at this pace. [...]  If you're not a size 6, then you're not good looking/Well you better be rich or be real good at cooking/You should probably lose some weight 'cause we can't see your bones/You should probably fix your face or you'll end up ...

Joss Whedon gave a speech the other day and had some things to say about feminism. A lot of it was problematic , but I won't go into it here because it's already been said , and the fact that he said it is only vaugely related to the point I want to make. See, Joss Whedon is free to say whatever he likes about feminism in a "freedom of speech" kind of way. That is his right. But the arrogance of suggesting that a movement centered on women and their efforts to advance their own causes should refocus itself based on the self-serving suggestion of a cishet white guy is, well.... astronomical. But truthfully, the bigger issue here is not what  he said, but the reaction to what he said. While I don't agree with the nitty gritty of his reasoning, there are legitimate complaints to be made about the word feminist, and the feminist movement. Women of Colour, and black women specifically, created womanism for this very reason; to address the issues that were unique to t...

No one likes to be wrong. No one likes to be told that something they do or so with no ill-intent, is in fact, incredibly offensive. We're living in a time where people are becoming increasingly aware of the ways in which different cultures interact, and the way in which history has coloured those interaction. We're realizing that callous disregard for the lived experiences of other people is no longer acceptable. But when you've grown up in a world that tells you that something is okay, it takes time and commitment to adjust your worldview. That's where "-isms" come in. Bigotry and intolerance are big, bad, intangible monsters, and no one person can fight them alone. But what we can do is call out the people we love on their bigotry when it rears its ugly head. I am personally of the belief that everyone is a little bit racist/sexist/classist etc. The world is set up in such a way as to reinforce those things as the prevailing accepted values, and anyone who ...

Last week, I read a great article  by Nichole Perkins on Buzzfeed that talked about the way the character development of the leading ladies of both Scandal and Sleepy Hollow were working towards dismantling the harmful depictions of "strong black women" in media. It was a great read, and I loved that someone else shared my conclusions about Olivia Pope's characterization.  What stuck out to me however, was Perkins' characterization of Gabourey Sidibe's character Queenie  on American Horror Story Coven as a negative embodiment of the "strong black woman" stereotype. She says: "Then there is Gabourey Sidibe as Queenie on  American Horror Story: Coven , a “human voodoo doll” whose supernatural power is the inability to feel pain, even as she inflicts said pain onto someone else. [...]  These Strong Black Women feel no emotional pain, tolerate severe physical trauma with no reaction, and menace others with stone faces." I love American Horror Stor...

I really, REALLY didn't want to post about Blackface Christmas this year, but after this, I couldn't help myself. This morning, Thought Catalog posted a completely tone deaf piece on Julianne Hough's blackface misstep, written by one Kelly Rheel. (I'm not linking to it because fuck TC) In the piece, Kelly argued that Julianne's blackface "isn't really blackface" because blackface only looks like this  apparently, and anything less is just "trying to have some fun." She also argued that though she is white, and doesn't understand the black experience, she didn't think this was an appropriate time for racial outrage. She posits that the Trayvon Martin blackface costume was problematic and racist (it most definitely was), but not Julianne's costume . She was dressing as a character  you see. Yes. That happened. There's so much privilege to unpack when it comes to a white woman deciding that she has the ability to decided what sh...

People think that I'm a princess because I don't like to use public transportation. I get teased about it all the time, and it doesn't help that my sense of navigation is abysmal. People think that I'm well-off and don't travel because I don't want to "slum it." Well, they're wrong on all counts. I do not like to use public transportation because doing so makes me feel unsafe. I hate travelling, and I only do it when absolutely necessary. I will  make plans around whether or not I will be required to travel. I will  sometimes abandon plans altogether if it means travelling through a certain place or past a certain hour. And honestly? I'm just lucky. I have sometime-y access to a personal vehicle, and a flexible enough schedule that I can make arrangements arounds it's availability to me. Lots of women don't have that privilege or that choice, but it's what I do to ensure my own sense of personal security and control. When I was you...

Last night's episode of Scandal was too much to handle on a number of levels. There was a ton going on, and if you blinked too often you probably missed half of it. But what stood out the most to me this week, was the incremental development of the souring relationship between FLOTUS Mellie Grant, and her husband, POTUS Fitzgerald Grant.  At the beginning of the season, I made a case for why Mellie doesn't deserve the bad reputation she's gotten, and this week, I think we got a little more information to back up my case. Bellamy Young's fantastic performance gave Mellie an emotional depth that I'm so glad we're finally getting to explore.  Firstly, Mellie still loves Fitz. There is no question about that. It is fact, and it becomes even more obvious as the weeks roll by. For whatever reason, Mellie loves her abusive asshole of a husband, and she wants things to work out between them. To me this episode, specifically her drunk speech in the dining room, shows th...

I had originally planned to do a full and proper follow-up piece, but in doing my research (yes, I do my research so I can back my shit up) I ended up down a rabbit hole that basically demonstrated why wasting my time rebutting would be pointless. This thing with Jezebel.... it's happened before , and it'll happen again. Nothing that I could ever do on that site will change the fact that they Jezebel is not intersectional because it does not want to be intersectional .  It's not hard to instigate a paradigm shift, not really. Not when you have so many WoC speaking up, reading and willing to tell their stories.  Jezebel is not intersectional because intersectionality is not cool.  It's not profitable.  It's too gauche  to give a voice to all the dirty brown poors. It took all of this to make me finally see that, but now that I have, I know that I'm right.  I decided I wouldn't rebut, but I ended up vomiting my displeasure all out on twitter anyway, so I'...

Anyone who knows me or has paid a lick of attention to this blog in the last month or so knows that I am no friend of Miley Cyrus . The woman is obliviously racist, willfully obtuse and completely ignorant. And that doesn't even take into account the fact that she spent yesterday shaming two women for their mental health issues. So no, Miley and I are not bosom buddies. But you see this shit ? I DO NOT NEED YOUR MALE OPINIONS SCORCH MAGAZINE, NOR DO I WANT THEM. And I'm no stranger to calling out misogynistic Trinidadian men on their shitty interpretations of gender relations. I've already cussed out a radio DJ  and a friend of a friend . There's nothing new about this asinine explanation of events. But it's still insidious, so I guess I'll go lace up my patriarchy smashing boots. This "article" is full of slut-shaming, body-shaming, concern trolling, gender essentialist, patriarchal bullshit. I do not need to read that. I have spend the last few ye...

One of the things that bothered me about the discussions that happened online over the HS debacle in the last few days was the rampant tone policing by defensive white women. It didn't happen a ton, but it happened enough that I was genuinely annoyed by it, especially since tone policing is a tactic that MRAs use  all the time  to derail feminist discussions. To see white women (who are supposed to be allies) use those same tactics against black women as a defense against their justifiable anger, and to protect themselves from accusations of racism was more than a little enraging.  So in an effort to make sure that no one is ever confused about why tone policing is bullshit and will automatically label someone as racist/sexist in my mind, I've pulled the following quotes from  this great piece  (which you should read in full) that explains it better than I ever could hope to do:  It’s cruel and ridiculous to expect a person to be calm and polite in response...